Love and Sex in Psychology
The
Seduction frequently spoken of love and sex, but also psychology has
much to say about them.
In
recent decades have conducted many studies trying to find an explanation for
what we have call love. For psychology love is a physiological need, an
impulse that may cause unpredictable behavior. Let's see the different
approaches of psychology to this topic.
Passionate
love and companionate love
Hatfield
and Rapson were the first to divide love into two types:
Love
Fellowship partner or:
has a high degree of attachment, commitment and intimacy, but is devoid of
passion. Is that we feel for our relatives or friends.
Passionate
love: the love for
the girlfriend or the girl you met last Saturday. Is stronger than love partner,
is very marked by sexuality and romance.
Triangular
Theory of Love
According
to this theory, formulated by Robert Sternberg, there are three distinct
components in Love:
Passion
desire to be with the other person and that sex with her is rewarding.
Intimacy: Ability to share our desires,
feelings and secrets with the other person.
Commitment: Assurance that no matter what that
person does not forget or leave us in the lurch.
Therefore
classes arises love 6 combinations of these elements:
Confidence
- Friendship: When
there is only intimacy. For example, the relationship can be had with a
psychologist with whom we have confidence. It also applies to the affection we
feel for a friend.
Infatuation: Passion only and only is
characterized by sexual desire. This is so-called love at first sight.
Empty
love: a love which
only Commitment: the passion and intimacy are dead or never existed.
Love
fool: Passion and
Commitment exist. It is more intense than infatuation.
Romantic
Love: there exists
Passion and Intimacy.
Sociable
Love: Intimacy +
Commitment, is given in couples who have lost their passion.
Full
love: a love with
the three characteristics is supposed to be the ideal love, but as psychology
does not last long: it is difficult to maintain and often leads to one of the
other types of love.
Dopamine,
Serotonin and Testosterone
From
a biological point of love can be explained almost entirely by the
action of a neurotransmitter: the dopamine.
Dopamine
is associated with emotions and feelings of pleasure. All addictions lead
generating strong dopamine: opiates, for example, activate the same areas that
love. Love, therefore, is a positive addiction that can turn into anxiety when
it is rejected. This is because love activates the brain's reward
system, which draws us to see rewards and motivate us to get them. For us, the
beloved is the prize, which is why we focus our world in it.
And
if complications this creates more attraction as an adversity in the brain
generates more dopamine.
Also
due to dopamine seek commonalities and try to mold our personality to please
the other, and that dopamine is also related to the motivation to change.
The
Serotonin called "pleasure hormone", has a great influence on the
system psiconervioso. If your levels are abnormally low and combined with the
momentum generated by dopamine, can cause obsessive thought for the other
person.
Love
and sexual attraction are two different things: in love affects dopamine in
the sexual act the testosterone and other sex hormones lesser extent, but this
line is not so clear: love always includes sexual component and if we
sex with a person can lead to love and sex that generates large amounts
of dopamine.
Mechanisms
of Attraction
Psychology
defines a number of components of attractiveness:
The
Moment: you have to
be willing to fall in love, and this does not always happen.
The
Environment: more
common in love with people nearby.
The
Mystery attracts
more people we do not know at all.
Personality: A component cultural / intellectual
/ personal.
Physicist: psychology recognizes that this is
an important factor.
Love
with the Mind and Eye
Why
are we attracted to strangers? Mysterious people we are interesting because
that mystery is associated with novelty, and novelty of love activates
neurotransmitter: dopamine. Although it is also contradictory because we are
attracted to people similar to us: common hobbies, physical characteristics,
age, etc. Similar genetic types attract.
Sensations
are different: for a stranger most of the attraction is due to the Passion (of
the Triangular Theory of Love), while the people around us and they are very
similar to us have more privacy.
The
cultural factor is also very important as it influences our conception of
infatuation and sees how far you can go: in love are considered social
rules as any other human relationship.
Love
Eye and the Mind
We
like our partner is well proportioned. Symmetrical faces are more attractive to
us. Of the facial symmetry can be assumed that there is good genetic material.
In women, the proportion is a physical ideal waist-hip ratio of 0.7, ie, the
waist has to be 70% of the hip. In men what is striking is a triangular shape
physically.
The
attraction in men occurs much faster than women, due to the fact that they give
more importance to physical factors. Women themselves have greater memory
activity, a woman always remembers the details of what has lived with a person,
what he did with that person, how. It's like prepare a "report" of
each person, that's why women are so retailers and for them is as important
attention to detail.
Infidelity
Men
and women view infidelity differently:
women fear emotional infidelity, since this would mean that your man will spend
less time and resources: would leave her alone in pregnancy and child rearing
in - when both she and the child are weaker. The man, on the other hand, fears
more sexual infidelity as this would be wasting time raising children that are
not yours.
At
the moment we fell in love tends to create Obsessive Surveillance, a
concept defined by psychologists that refers to a state of constant vigilance
on the other. This would also be part of a progressive attempt Betaising the
other guy, because once you have the child how important it is to care. That's
why in a relationship tends to neutralize the individual personalities and fit
a new personality common with another person in order to take care of both this
new project.
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